I PROCLAIM 2008 TO BE THE YEAR OF MANNY!

The Book of Manny

1:1 And in this, The Year of Manny (TYoM), Manny himself has seen fit to bless us with an opening day win.
1:2 And hey, Manny did look upon the game and see. Yo, the A's were winning. And He was pissed. But not so you'd really notice.
1:3 And he did emerge from the dugout.
1:4 And he did hit two doubles with a bunch of RBI on Opening Day. And lo the Red Sox did win, defeating Oakland 6-5.
1:5 And he did chew gum.

2:1 The Tale of Manny's Second Double: His second blast off the right center field wall was so titanic, so monumentus, so stupendous, that Manny himself was awed by it.
2:2 So awed, in fact, that his legs ceased to function properly.
2:3 Try as he might, Manny was unable to move forward. Only his arms, waiving in the air, worked as he desired. Then the ball did hit the wall.
2:4 Dunk.
2:5 And yeo,
2:6 Manny's legs began to move. And soon he was at second base.
2: And runs did cross the plate.
2:8 And he did smile.

2:8 (Also a bunch of other things happened.)